Emotional Eating PDX

This morning my gifted NIA teacher, facilitated a dance of honor to a fellow NIA dancer who has recently passed. It was a graceful, exhilarating, powerful experience.  This woman will live forever with us, her spirit alive, dancing freely in her brightly colored clothing, with her neon hair. She is and we are embracing her essence, which is moving elsewhere in the universe now, but nonetheless, is a part of the whole, the source, and so, what is death?

As a student of Eckhardt Tolle, what he teaches resonates with me.  Does death occur when a person leaves the human form, or is that a transition to true essence?  It shall remain a mystery.  What we do know is that loss occurs when one passes, loss of relationship and other joys we may have known on this planet.  This is especially true of those of us left here, I think.  Part of why people are afraid to die are reflected in these two reasons, with another huge factor being fear of the unknown.  And this fear plays out over and over again as many of us make decisions that keep us stuck in the unhappy familiar.

Ironically enough, we die while still in human form each time we deny our essence, that beautiful, aliveness that is us, essentially us.  The one unique spirit that is connected to all and to the Source, which lends us support and love anytime we tap into it.

In dancing in honor of our companion today, Sierre took us to a deep place within, noting that we never know when the time to leave this planet will take place.  Therefore, if you want to live, LIVE.

Part of consciously living is acknowledging the shadow self.  We may have several shadows, things that plague us due to family of origin dynamics; abuse, addictions, health issues, familial expectations.  Shadows can arise out of comparing ourselves to others; in this world of multi-tasking and the expectation that people should excel in everything they do, we are at risk to be hounded by the voice of not being good enough.  These legacies and beliefs can be so challenging, that instead of acknowledging them, we check out through overeating, over-drinking, drug use, over-working, compulsive spending, compulsive use of technology.  Who needs to die as we commonly know it, when we can die while still in human form!  We can disconnect from our true selves, the people we love, the natural earth.  We can die and choose not to live day after earthly day simply by choosing our compulsive behavior instead of choosing ourselves.

Ask yourself now, “If I were to die today (meaning that my human form would leave the planet) how would people remember me?  What legacies would I leave?”

Would people hold your lovely essence because that is what you chose day after day?  Or would people remember you as exhausted, crabby, distanced, struggling with compulsive behaviors, blaming, judgmental, and defeated?  In other words, dying….

Ahh, this NIA dance this morning was soooo good!  Sierre invited us to face our shadows, acknowledge them (no healing can take place without this), dance with them, disengage with them, cut the cords, be released, and dance into the light.

You see, and this is the thing.  We all struggle.  We are one and the same.  The human experience is hard, no doubt about it.  But we believe we’ll make it better, easier by checking out.  We don’t, we make it progressively harder by making that choice.  When we chronically check out, we abandon ourselves, leaving us adrift, bereft, alone.

While dancing and facing my own demons, I received a message and a visual aid.  The image of myself as a beautiful, joyful 6 month old infant came to me with the words, “Choose her, she is your essence.”

I keep this picture of myself in my kitchen to help enlist a loving compassionate voice instead of the harsh, berating voice.  But right now since I’m going through some hard stuff, I’m going to find a different spot for her that is front and center, so I can see her every day and consciously choose her.  Because, why, oh why, would I choose to abandon that precious baby?

I invite you to ask the same question of yourself…would you really abandon that little self?